


Towering

by Set_Suna



Series: Pogtopia Breakdown [9]
Category: Minecraft (Video Game), Video Blogging RPF
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Anxiety, Depression, Family Dynamics, Gen, Hurt/Comfort, Implied/Referenced Suicide, No Beta We Die Like Wilbur in Skyblockle, None of them are really, Panic Attacks, Sleep Deprivation, Suicidal Thoughts, Suicide Attempt, TW'S!!!!:, Tommy cries, Wilbur's not okay, does not actually happen, end tw's, the sleepy bois are practically brothers sorry I don't make the rules
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-15
Updated: 2020-11-15
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:27:40
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,094
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27573073
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Set_Suna/pseuds/Set_Suna
Summary: His communicator buzzed, making an awful sound as it vibrated on the stone next to his foot. Wilbur checked it, still feeling numb as he read the message.[Technoblade] where are you, Tommy's freaking outWilbur hummed. He sent a reply and tossed his communicator behind him, not bothering to check as it continued to buzz.[WilburSoot] Manberg[WilburSoot] It's a lovely nightHe didn't see the wall of replies Techno sent.[Technoblade] what the fuck[Technoblade] Wil what the fuck are you doing[Technoblade] answer me you emo fuckHis cheeks were beginning to sting. Windburn was a bitch. He wondered if Technoblade would come looking for him, or if he'd stand at the bottom and watch him fall. Wilbur couldn't feel his fingertips. He couldn't feel anything, really.
Relationships: Dave | Technoblade & TommyInnit, Dave | Technoblade & Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit, Wilbur Soot & TommyInnit
Series: Pogtopia Breakdown [9]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1986469
Comments: 19
Kudos: 595
Collections: SBI Family Feels





	Towering

**Author's Note:**

> PLEASE HEED THE TAGS FOR TW'S!!! This is a heavy one, y'all. I got very emotional and this was the result.

Wilbur hadn't slept in three days. He knew that wasn't good, but it didn't make him want to try to sleep. He'd been focusing on ways to help boost Pogtopia's strength and the possible ways they could coordinate with Bad and them to take on Schlatt. He'd been trying to smooth over Fundy's relationships with everyone. Tubbo, Quackity, and Techno had come around, but Tommy and Niki still kept him at arms length. He said he would help his son and by god he would do it if it killed him. 

He'd been spacing out a lot recently, too. He would be staring at a map or a letter or listening to his friends and family talk at dinner only to realize when they say his name he has no idea what they were talking about. It may have been getting worse, recently, but no one had to know. He had been sitting by the fire reviewing their inventory then suddenly hours had passed and Fundy was getting him for a meeting. He sensed his son's concern, but nothing was said about it. 

The introduction of a traitor did nothing for Wil's mental state. He felt himself slipping, but not in the same way as before. He felt it when he was on his 32nd hour awake. He felt it when he saw Tommy throw a mean look Fundy's way. He knew something was wrong when Techno physically had to drag him from the war room and make him snap back into focus. 

He couldn't handle another betrayal. 

It made it all so much worse considering he had no idea who it was. He couldn't believe anyone in Pogtopia would betray him, so if it wasn't any of them, why did it matter? The way Dream seemed so entertained when he'd relayed the information stuck to Wilbur's brain like gum to the bottom of a shoe. Who could it be to make him so excited? 

Techno was saying something to him. Something about taking a break, getting some sleep. He obviously knew Wilbur hadn't slept for days. He appreciated his brother and how much he cared, he really did, but when Techno took him to his room and went to rejoin the others, Wilbur didn't sleep. Usually, this kind of act from Techno would compel Wilbur to do whatever was asked of him. Today, it felt empty. Meaningless. 

He stared at his ceiling for a while, then glanced at the map over on his desk. Thinking about it, there were a lot of tall places in Manberg and the Dream SMP in general. A lot of towers. He'd perched with Tommy on many of them, watching events they weren't supposed to see unfold. They were all long drops. Drops that would kill any normal person if they fell. 

When Wil found himself quietly making his way out of the ravine, he thought nothing of it. He needed some fresh air. When he started heading toward Manberg without telling anyone where he was going, he didn't think to turn back. When his eyes landed on Eret's tower in the distance, he didn't think about how he knew his destination. 

-

Tommy was officially freaking out. He couldn't find Wilbur _anywhere_. He'd went to his room to fetch him for dinner and he wasn't there. He scoured the rest of the ravine in search of him and came up with nothing. He'd ignored Niki's concerned "Tommy?" as he ran past her and up to the dirt shack. When he still didn't see Wilbur, he burst outside. Now, he was searching the woods in the dark for his brother. 

"Wil?! Wilbur?!" he called, hoping for any sort of response. 

Each of his breaths was starting to hurt. His knees were shaking so much he lost his balance. He caught himself on a tree to avoid collapsing to the floor. He couldn't lose Wilbur. Not again. Not after he'd just gotten him back. The world was spinning and Tommy felt like there was nothing he could do to get a hold of it. 

He felt hands on his shoulders. He could faintly see the outline of Techno in the dark. His brother pushed the hair out of his face and held him up. 

"Tommy, Tommy what's wrong?" he asked. "Why are you out here alone in the dark?" 

"Wil-Wilbur's gone," Tommy choked out. Tears started to push out of his eyes as he wheezed. It was getting harder and harder to breathe. He sank to the ground and Techno came with him. "Techno Wilbur's gone. He wasn't in the ravine and I can't find him and I _can't lose him again-!_ "

Techno tugged Tommy to his chest. His vision was blurry and he felt like he was hearing Techno through a tunnel. Still, his brother's voice reached his ears.

"Tommy, I need you to calm down, okay?" Techno's low voice told him. "Breathe with me, Toms. You need to breathe." 

He inhaled stutteringly. He felt Techno's chest rise and fall against his cheek. He did as Techno asked, cause he really didn't know what else to do. He was still crying and his heart was still racing, but his chest didn't hurt as much anymore. The pain faded, but the fear stayed. Techno rubbed his back soothingly. 

"Now, tell me what's wrong. What do you mean Wilbur's gone?" Techno questioned. 

"He's not in the ravine and I can't find him," Tommy cried. He gripped the front of Techno's chest plate. "I can't lose him again, Tech." 

Techno tensed before slipping away from him. He pulled out his communicator as he said, "It's alright, Tommy. We're gonna find him." 

Tommy pathetically scrubbed at his face. He was hiccuping and choking on the air trying to get into his lungs. He felt like he could slip back into that state at any moment. He hated it. He wanted Wilbur. Techno sent a message before helping Tommy to his feet. He wiped the tear tracks off Tommy's face and took his hand. 

Techno repeated, "We're gonna find him."

-

The cold and cutting wind whipped at Wilbur's cheeks. He'd climbed up Eret's tower maybe ten minutes ago. The sight was the same; the podium, the Prime Path, the desolate festival grounds. He tried to ignore the blood he saw on the cobblestones every time he blinked. It felt lonely being up there without Tommy, but he didn't come here to spy on Schlatt's latest decree. He came here to do something that only mattered for him. He could see it now.

Standing on the stone barrier they often leaned over, Wilbur pushed down the nausea that came from the strong feeling of vertigo. He was very high up. One step the wrong direction and it was _splat_ for good ol' crazy Wilbur Soot. His bones would break and his neck would snap and blood would pour from a crack in his skull. The residents of Manberg would find him the next morning, probably celebrate the timely demise of their enemy. Maybe Schlatt would hold another festival. Kill someone off for good this time. 

He hadn't realized how quickly he'd spiraled. Wilbur thought he was doing pretty okay. He couldn't exactly determine what drove him to this point. He did have a strong desire for this nightmare to just be _over_ already. Everyone was finally coming back together, then that solid ground he'd been standing on turned into a trapdoor through which he fell immediately. Someone else was going to betray him. He was tired. He didn't feel like fighting anymore. He blinked slowly, staring at the grass below as another gust of wind whipped his coat around him. He wondered how it would feel to die. 

His communicator buzzed, making an awful sound as it vibrated on the stone next to his foot. Wilbur checked it, still feeling numb as he read the message. 

_[Technoblade] where are you, Tommy's freaking out_

Wilbur hummed. He sent a reply and tossed his communicator behind him, not bothering to check as it continued to buzz.

_[WilburSoot] Manberg_

_[WilburSoot] It's a lovely night_

He didn't see the wall of replies Techno sent.

_[Technoblade] what the fuck_

_[Technoblade] Wil what the fuck are you doing_

_[Technoblade] answer me you emo fuck_

His cheeks were beginning to sting. Windburn was a bitch. He wondered if Technoblade would come looking for him, or if he'd stand at the bottom and watch him fall. Wilbur couldn't feel his fingertips. He couldn't feel anything, really.

He thought he'd been happy. He'd been spending time with everyone, laughing and smiling just like it used to be. He didn't know he was still so broken. Maybe it was obvious, with the self-deprecating thoughts and all the mornings he struggled to get out of bed. He wasn't so set on destroying things anymore, so he kind of ignored his feelings, it seemed. What more was there to say?

Wilbur tilted his head up. The sky was clear. He could see the stars. It really was a lovely night. Shame he'd have to ruin it. 

"Wilbur, Jesus Christ, what are you doing?" Techno's voice asked suddenly.

Wil tilted his head back, meeting Techno's eyes over his shoulder. His brother looked mildly horrified. Wilbur turned away, choosing to look at the stars instead. He wondered if they'd welcome him. 

"Honestly, Techno, I'm not sure. I was thinking of taking a step forward. Seeing how much it hurt," Wil told him. 

"You don't have to do this, Wil," Techno told him, suddenly stern. "We can work this out. We haven't lost yet, just, _please,_ for fuck's sake get off the ledge-"

"Why, Technoblade? Why should I do that? Just so I can be betrayed again and continue to lose all the things I hold dear? I don't think so."

"Because this is a lethal fix to a temporary problem, Wil, this isn't-"

"-the way to fix things? I've tried so many ways to fix it, Techno, and I'm running out of options here-"

"Wil?"

It was tiny. The smallest voice Wilbur's ever heard. It took him a second to realize who it came from. That fear and regret and anguish didn't belong in that voice. The person that voice belonged to wasn't supposed to see this. They weren't ever supposed to sound that broken. But again, it was Wilbur's fault they sounded like that in the first place.

God, Wilbur had made _Tommy_ sound like that. His Tommy. His loud, smart, caring, emotional, scared little brother. Something cracked in him.

He swayed. He couldn't do it. Not here, not now, not ever. Definitely not with Tommy staring into his back. Tommy was a child. Wilbur wasn't about to throw himself off a building in front of a child, especially not his baby brother. He didn't resist when Techno's hand clamped around his wrist and pulled him down. 

In an instant, a puff of messy blond hair collided with his chest. Tommy was sobbing and shaking and squeezing Wilbur like if he let go he'd lose him forever. 

"Please, Wilbur, please don't leave I can't- I can't lose you again. I need you, Wil, I need you and I love you so much, _please don't go-_ " 

Wilbur had made one promise to himself on the night that Tommy had dragged him back into the ravine. He swore to himself that he'd never hurt Tommy again. And just like that night, he felt tears pooling in his eyes and running over. He hid his face in Tommy's hair and let his tears fall into his curls. 

"I love you too, Toms. I'm so sorry. I'm sorry I hurt you again," he cried. "I'm-I'm gonna try to be better, okay? I'm not leaving. I'll do my best, alright?"

He wasn't sure if he meant the last part. He still felt incredibly unstable. All he knew was the tears streaming from his eyes were genuine and he had to do literally anything to stop Tommy's crying. He couldn't stand making his brother cry.

Tension finally dissolving, Techno wrapped his arms around his brothers. He tucked his head in Wilbur's neck and muttered, "We're gonna help you, Wilbur. We'll help you through this. You aren't alone." 

And Wilbur sobbed. He melted into his brothers and felt so much more than he had in days. His chest hurt and his heart hurt and his head hurt and he was _scared_. He didn't want to be broken anymore. He wanted to be safe and happy and _not broken_. 

Wilbur was tired. He wanted to sleep.

**Author's Note:**

> Please tell me if I missed anything I should tag I'm not the best at this sort of thing!!!
> 
> I appreciate any and all comments/kudos/bookmarks you choose to leave! 
> 
> You can follow my [tumblr](https://quibbels.tumblr.com/) for fic updates and my [twitter](https://mobile.twitter.com/quiblii) to see more stuff from me!


End file.
